You know intoxication and emotions, or rather feelings, are not a good combination but you do it anyway because you think it’ll “numb the pain” ... well, unfortunately not.

You see yourself drowning with every sip you take but because you are a survivor of the big bad world, you believe you will float to the shore of happiness... maybe someone will save you.

You feel your heart break with every sip you take... you feel every tear, drop even though you are not crying... feeling your sense slowly slip away but because you’ve got spirit, you still fight for some sort of sanity.

You think of ideas and solutions that might help but because you have anxiety, everything seems like a bad idea.

When you’re longing for someone to ask what’s wrong but you don’t need intrusions because you’re a strong independent woman!

“Fuck it man, you’re a MAN! You’re strong! Just drink to it man!” I swear this is at the back of my mind every time I try to show some sort of emotion.

The feels man!

Diary of an alcoholic